toddling

 
summer never lingers like its best afternoons, so we've been trying to squeeze in as many picnics and ice creams as possible. most recently violet ordered her own chocolate chip cone ("white") but rejected it in favor of our friend monica's strawberry chip. thanks for the pics (and the good sharing), mon.

when monica asked violet to pretend to be asleep, here is what happened. love the squint so much.

in other news, violet slipped while running last week and bumped the lower back of her head on the floor, which i didn't think was any news until she began vomiting exorcist style. she was not nearly as traumatized as her parents. an after hours call to the pediatrician resulted in a visit to the ER. diagnosis: mild concussion. she's fine, and whatever dizziness caused her to throw up four separate times was gone by the next day, but this is the kind of thing that rattles whatever fragile confidence in my parenting that i've built up.

in happier news, kevin and i lived another year to celebrate our birthdays. at the drug store, violet picked out kevin's card all by herself -- a diego card intended for little boys -- and by picked out i mean that she plucked it from the shelf, kissed it several times, ran around in circles with it, and refused to relinquish it, even to the cashier. several days later, she was elated to be reunited with it... and once again refused to relinquish it. "my diego card! no dada!"

first field trip

i was so happy to be able to join violet's class for a walking excursion to the butterfly pavilion. there were 12 toddlers, four teachers, five moms, two wagons and a couple of strollers. i wanted so badly to pack capri sun. when i was a kid that's what my mom would pack special for school field trips, and i would be so excited. but i realized that capri sun wouldn't inspire much excitement for violet ("dohn yike juice"). what's the lightweight champ's beverage of choice? "agua!" of course. girl loves water so much that she insisted on riding next to the jug in the wagon.

as i'm sure anyone reading this knows, my sister (auntie courtney) is a first-grade teacher, and she's told me of her secret delight watching volunteer moms try to wrangle the two dozen plus kids that she wrangles solo everyday. i personally will never take this for granted. the toddler world seems especially daunting because of the physicality and hypervigilance needed to prevent all these little cavepeople from beating on each other, and violet is without a doubt one of the biggest challenges, if not the biggest in the dolphin room. by which i mean she's a hair puller, a shover and a biter. thankfully the biting has been pretty limited, and she's taken more than she's dished out, but they still have to shadow her like crazy. "we don't want to restrict her because that wouldn't be fair," her teacher told me earnestly. uh, at home we put her on time out behind the dog gate, i thought. but i appreciate their dedication to protecting her toddler freedoms.

it was a long trek across campus, but the kids obviously loved the novelty of the experience. they got to wander over to splash in fountains and pick flowers from the always impeccable landscaping (privileges that i'm sure aren't extended to actual usc students). upon arrival, violet was the first to march inside like she owned the place. for as clingy as she can still be, she's also incredibly brave.

the dolphin kids made signature t-shirts, bucket hats and visors for the event, and the butterfly pavilion was a perfect choice destination because it's a fairly small enclosed greenhouse-style area. in other words, we didn't lose any kids.

violet has developed a minor fear of bugs, i think due to a few surprises at home, like when a little spider crawled across the bathroom floor as she was getting undressed. she screamed in terror and leaped at me. it was pretty heartbreaking. we play it like "oh it's just a bug." i don't want her to be afraid of them, but by the same token i'm happy she's not bounding out in the yard trying to catch bees in her mouth like our idiot dogs.

inside the pavilion the butterflies are just fluttering around of course, mostly landing on flowers right by the pathway so it's easy for the visitors to observe them. it's actually easiest for children because of the height. violet was a little apprehensive at first, but once she understood that they weren't trying to "get you," she settled in well.

the kids' interest held for close to a half hour before we herded out the exit and cracked open the water jug like it was a kalua pig. it's incredible how long every little thing takes with a group of toddlers, and it makes me wonder if the teachers' patience is innate or cultivated. if it's the latter, i'd like to get in on their trade secrets. i honestly wasn't sure we were ever going to get out of the classroom in the first place since every kid needed shoes and sunscreen, half needed diapers and the potty-training half needed to go to the bathroom, and then you turn around and violet has already ripped off her shoes.

but we did make it! chalk it up to the magic of the outdoors, but no kids had meltdowns and everyone had fun. by the end, of course, all were tuckered, so the walk back was easy, a lot of dazed toddlers asking for lunch.

my feelings about being a "working mom" aren't something i address much here (at least in a direct way) because it's such a complicated conversation that's just so intimidating to write about, but, in a nutshell: i like the sense of security that a paycheck brings; i hate to miss big chunks of violet's days. i have to believe most parents (and people for that matter) feel like this -- like that work-life balance is a dangling carrot. do i "need" to work? that's a question that kevin and i are lucky we're even able to discuss. without a doubt, i feel blessed to have a pleasant 9-5 job that's honest work, with enough flexibility for me to do things like go on violet's field trips with her, and i feel even more blessed that she has such loving caregivers, who are a huge part of her life. sure, there will always be those nagging doubts, like would she have a better shot at the pulitzer if i were to stay at home? but i don't doubt that these women love her, and whoever she ends up being, their fingerprints will be all over it. and i mean, she may be a thug, but she's a happy thug.

anniversary week

kevin and i celebrated our five-year anniversary on sunday, but we exploited the occasion all week long. kevin was on hiatus, and i escaped jury service and took a couple of days off work. the week ended up feeling like an impromptu vacation -- almost as awesome as an impromptu run through the sprinklers while walking home from the neighborhood pizza joint.

violet is becoming a real chatterbox lately. i know she's mostly parroting, but it's remarkable how often she manages to drum up a (mostly) grammatically correct sentence, usually involving her school buddies and/or characters from the dora-diego posse. the above photo should be captioned "diego run in sprinklers and get his jeans wet too!" enunciation is still a hurdle (no one but kevin or i would be able to translate that last sentence) but improves in sudden spurts. "teacher z" is now "teacher rosina" and "teacher zaa" is now "teacher roxana." this happened last week, and both teachers (her two primary caregivers) were giddy that violet had figured out how to say their names properly. rosina actually called me at work to let me know.

this morning i caught violet singing to herself for the first time while on the drive to school. row row row your boat. "life ees deeee!"

another first was the bounce house. there's one at the sunday farmer's market, and violet has jumped her little heart out three weekends in a row. she gets scared when big kids go in, but we get there early enough (when the balloon is still being inflated) that it's usually just toddlers at that point. god, remember the joy?

i also took violet to her first sit-down live performance at the ford ampitheatre, at the fantastic suggestion of our friend marah who works there. the show was gaelic music and dancing, part of a summer event series designed for kids and families. making sure to show proper respect for her heritage, violet was well behaved for the first ten minutes. in fact, i dare say she was riveted for the first song and the first step-dancing. but soon enough, she started to flail about and shout intermittently. i searched her romper for the hidden whiskey flask and, coming up empty, moved into emergency peanut butter sandwich mode. after that, we abandoned our seats... and discovered all the other toddlers in attendance, running around the corridors. all in all, i'd call the outing a success, but it's going to be a couple more years before i let nana and auntie courtney live out their life's dream of taking her to see the nutcracker.

in other festivities, we hit up the neighborhood july 4th parade, which featured two high school marching bands and dozens of kids riding decorated bikes, trikes and wagons. violet and her buddy jack were mesmerized by the fanfare, and their parents were mesmerized by the sight of pajama-clad ed asner, watching the low-budget production from his front yard. the procession ended at a park, and we made the mistake of letting violet and jack head straight for the playground while the veteran parents made a beeline for the free corn dogs and lemonade. by the time we got to the food stands, there was only watermelon left. "vivi dohn yike wah-meh." right.

we also took violet to universal citywalk, thinking perhaps she could stay up for fireworks. by early evening, however, the loopiness set in. it was also surprisingly chilly, for which we were unprepared, and violet insisted on wearing kevin's shirt, which made her look like the world's tiniest ph.d. graduate. if you ask her where she goes to school, she now replies, "USC!" (dada just died a little on the inside.)

luckily, kevin had recorded an east coast feed of the washington d.c. fireworks, so back at home, we plopped violet in front of the tv and waited in anticipation of her amazement at the spectacle. here's how the conversation went:

kevin: do you see the fireworks, violet? boom!
violet: don't pick your nose, dora!
stacey: look at the red firework violet! isn't it pretty?
violet: don't pick your nose, boots! ees yucky! eck!
kevin: violet, look at all the colors. wow!
violet: don't pick your nose, dora! ees yucky! eck! ECK!!!

and off to bed she went.

on thursday and friday, kevin and i showcased our loving parenting by dropping off violet at daycare and hitting the town. we saw the amazing spider-man in 3D at the cinerama dome. we had oysters and cocktails at gjelina and the hungry cat. we popped in for the haute couture of snickers bars at tavern on thursday and still managed to pick up violet early on friday to go for yet more ice cream. and as if we aren't spoiled rotten enough, nana came up a night to babysit so that we could go out to dinner at the saddle peak lodge. we left with this year's vacation fund deposited in our bellies.